Creeping January

IMG_3662, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

Nothing new to report - Brenden told his first joke (that I understood):

Brenden: "This is yummy!" (referring to his strawberry flavored applesauce).

Me: "I'm glad you like it."

Brenden: "No, mama, you say 'you can say that again'! Ok? I say is yummy, you say 'you can say that again'!"

Me: "Um, ok."

Brenden: "This is yummy!"

Me: "You can say that again!"

Brenden: "This is yummy! Hahaha! Isn't that funny, mama? Isn't that funny?"

Of course it was.

Also: Happy 92nd birthday to Major Richard Winters, the only nonagenarian I have ever had a crush on. Watch Band of Brothers if you have no idea who I'm talking about.

Winter Fire

IMG_3666, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

What I'm Watching / Reading:

Land of the Lost: No Trope links because this is a will Ferrell movie which has become kind of a trope in itself. So I was wrong about my prejudgement about this movie. It was not worse than G.I. Joe. and that is damning it with faint praise. Some people consider this movie a rape of their childhood, but really: Land of the Lost? Sure, I watched it when I was a kid but even back then I knew it was a lame show. Most of the funny moments involve scenes with Matt Lauer.

9: Animated post-apocalyptic tale. Fascinating to look at, but it had some plotting problems.

Extract: I love Mike Judge and here he does what he always does - he shows us idiots being idiotic. The protagonist is a chemist and owns his own business so you think he'd be a little less stupid than the idiots who work for him, but he accidentally takes a horse tranquilizer and ends up getting talked into hiring a gigolo to have sex with his wife. See, this way he can cheat on her, guilt-free. This movie had its moments but on the whole I'd rather see Idiocracy again.

Under the Dome: This Stephen King book is about a thousand pages long and I read it in about 3 days. It's a page turner (kindle clicker?) about a small town that gets trapped underneath an impregnable force-field. I won't go into more to avoid spoilers except near the end of the book I was shaking so bad I didn't want to finish it. I'm glad I did though. I think it's some of his best writing ever. Your mileage may vary, of course.

American Idol is back, and it's Simon Cowell's last season. How the hell can AI go on? The whole reason to watch the show is to see Simon cut off some clueless contestant at the knees then dash a cup full of piss-tinged reality into said contestant's face. All with that dry british drawl. Also Paula Abdul is gone. No more incoherent drug-fueled rambling. How boring! I didn't last long last season, anyway. I doubt I'll make it past Hollywood week for this one either.

2009: The Year in Recap Form

Magic and Dutchman, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

January: Visit to Ed and Jen's place in Massachusetts. Snow! Yay!
February: Disney Cruise to the Caribbean! Yar!
March: Battlestar Galactica ended. Whaa!
April: I got a Kindle (II). Yay!
May: Life (the TV show) got canned. Boo! But, I also got to see a great movie in the theater (Star Trek). Yay!
June: Much remodeling work done around our house. Ouch!
July: I earned a trip to the emergency room due to a bulging disc. Ouchouchouchouchouch. Also new kitties. Meow.
August: Jon and I have our 10 year anniversary. Muah!
September: Great Tampa visit w/ dad and Ilu so Brenden can go to the beach. Whee!
October: We go camping and Brenden catches a catfish. Yum!
November: Thanksgiving in Oklahoma. Yum!
December: Long nothing-doing vacation at home during Christmas. Ahhhhhhhhhh.........!

So there you have my year in review. Heh.

Rabbids

Raving Rabbids!!!!!!, originally uploaded by meljpouliot.

I had a whole week off for Christmas, plus New Years. We didn't go anywhere and just stayed home. Jon did some work on the house but spent a chunk of time at the drop zone. He bought me Dragon Age: Origins for Christmas and I spent most of my free time playing it.

Like Bioshock is distantly related to System Shock II this game is the indirect descendant of Baldur's Gate. BG is an FRPG based on Dungeons and Dragons. DAO isn't D&D but it will be quite familiar to any experienced RPG gamers. At first I thought the story line was too limiting - I think I'm spoiled by the open worlds of Bethesda Softwork's Elder Scroll series, not to mention my favoritest Fallout 3. DAO's characters and story line sucked me in, however.

I won't go into details - there's a blight upon the land and your character is called upon to stop it. You meet people along the way who can join you for your quest and you can get kind of attached to some of them.

Anyone who remembers the somewhat stilted dialog from portions of Baldur's Gate take heart: the people who wrote Dragon Age apparently watch Joss Whedon shows and the conversation is more entertaining than usual. The first NPC who can join your party, Alastair, is a cross between Xander from Buffy and Mal from Firefly. That's according to the people who designed him and it's a fairly accurate assessment.

Brenden got loads of toys besides the way-cool brain-sucking space aliens. He received a Wii game that he's addicted to: Ubi-Soft's Rabbids go home (it is spelled "rabbid" and for good reason). He was entertained for almost an hour when he discovered a portion of the game where one of the rabbids gets stuck in your controller. You shake the controller and the rabbid makes lots of noises while on screen you see a little cartoon rabbid careening of the interior of a Wii remote. The rabbid is pretty happy about it. Anyway Brenden squees and laughs his little buttocks off when he plays.

Which is great, because it gives me more time to fight blood mages, darkspawn, and the occasional archdemon.

Things from Outer Space

IMG_3672, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

Merry Christmas, everybody! By happy accident, Brenden received the best toy I have ever seen. On my recommendation his abuela and grandpa sent him the Imaginext Space Station. It included these horrible looking octopoid aliens as you can see above. Well as you can see in the picture below, they sit nciely on the play figures' heads. Brain-sucking space aliens for your preschooler! Fischer-Price FTW!

We Suck!

District 9 Bus Bench MNU Sign Teaser, originally uploaded by district9pics.

What I'm Watching:

Because of the enormous amount of time I've spent perusing Tv Tropes I'm afraid my reviews will never be the same. That site has become an enormous time waster resource for me. For instance, when I rambled about Kirk/Spock and Hector/Achilles I really, really wanted to do some quick Google searches to confirm my suspicions but didn't want to lose my remaining eye. Tv Tropes, thankfully, provided me with information about Rule 34 of the Internet without going into too many gory details. Their linktastic pages lead me to Ho Yay (which I find amusing and entertaining - I just don't want to read 40 pages of pr0n about it) and No Yay, which I will not link to because while the image on that page is SFW, I found it deeply, deeply disturbing. If you go to TV Tropes and search on that term, you will not be happy. You have been warned. Don't do it!

So anyways. I watched District 9 (the link contains spoilers!) last night, and while I don't particularly like Humans are Bastards stories, this one tells its story in a palatable manner (for me. I want to see Avatar sometime next week and I just know Cameron is going to beat me about the head and shoulders with the same Trope, which is why I didn't try to see it on opening night). It was palatable because the bastardry was mostly believable and because there's a scene when someone does their very best when things are at their very worst (That's a trope exemplified in John Carpenter's forgotten Starman - Big Damn Heroes might be the closest trope I found.) Collectively yeah we suck but we're not condemned to suckage at an individual level.

I just realized I haven't given a plot synopsis. An alien space ship hovers over Johannesburg, South Africa. The inhabitants come across as stupid, ugly insectoid aliens who quickly get sent to a JoBurg ghetto and cause problems. Finally after 20 years the aliens are to be rounded up and moved away from the city and most of the action takes place when a private company (an evil one, natch) sets out to herd them up and move them out. The protagonist, Wikus Van Der Merwe (Sharlto Copley, and I am on the give-him-an-Oscar bandwagon though it will never happen because this is SCIENCE FICTION), has been put in charge of this operation and this bland little Afrikaans twit has himself an interesting time. See the movie it's awesome. F-Bombs and splattage ahoy, though. Oh! and an awesome Macross Missile Massacre! SRSLY!

If you have seen it, here's a great review / examination from a South African's perspective.

FEET

PictureOK3 087, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

Random bits:

Fringe had numerous Re-Animator references last episode. Considering the bad guy was someone whose head was re-attached they were hilariously appropriate.

I have read over 50 books since I got my Kindle in March. When I was in high school and college those numbers would have indicated a slow year. I think that's the most I've read in the last 5 years put together, and yes, I'm sad about that. I've totally fallen in love with reading again. The Kindle has 3 features I love: 1) Instant downloads, 2) book samples, and 3) large font sizes. Yes, my eyesight is going to crap again.

Brenden really loves cooking. We made cookies from scratch last weekend and I'm always looking for recipes he can help me with. I envision many holiday treats this coming holiday break.

While Christmas shopping I found the 1st season of Veronica Mars for $20 so I snagged it. I'm actually going to start re-watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer this weekend though. The reason is this website: TV Tropes. It contains many BtVS references (which made me want to start a rewatch) and is a huge timekiller. Don't say I didn't warn you though.

We watched Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince last night. I thought it was a pretty good adaptation of the movie despite all the missing scenes. Mrs. Damian Lewis, Helen McCrory, has a small part in it playing Narcissa Malfoy. There was no sign of Jason Isaacs or Ralph Fiennes, though. Pity.

What I'm Watching

PictureOK3 136, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

Jon wanted to rent a movie and here were our choices:

Transformers II
G.I. Joe: Rise of the Cobra
Terminator: Salvation
Year 1
Land of the Lost

I voted for G.I. Joe. Even after watching it I still feel I made the wisest choice. The plot involved Chris Eccleston sporting a scottish accent that would make Mike Myers blush and he's a weapons dealer who is evil. And then there's Team America: World Police who trash Paris. Or was that a different movie? Paris does get trashed but the Joe team is multinational. I think - all the main characters were American. I was distracted by all the explosions. Pretty!

Headaches for Mama

PictureOK3 171, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

I cleaned the house Saturday and sunday to prep it for Christmas decorating. When I pulled the white christmas tree from the attic Brenden and both evil kittens were ecstatic. My blood pressure went through the roof trying to keep a small child and two large cats from climbing the tree. So far 11 or 12 ornaments have been broken and when I go replace them I'm going to buy plastic ones.

To top it off Brenden broke the screen on my Kindle Sunday. Fortunately it's still under warranty and the cheerful helpdesk guy at Amazon is sending me a new one and they're even paying the postage for when I return my old one. So Amazon's customer service gets a big "Hooray!" from me.

Oh Noes! Mom is rambling again!

PictureOK3 135, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

While watching the new Star Trek, the good chemistry between Chris Pine (Kirk) and Zachary Quinto(Spock) got me thinking, and scared, and I really don't want to go a-googling, but I'm betting that movie launched a billion slash fanfics. If you don't know what slash is, congradulate yourself and go look at some funny kittys. If you do know, and you read it (or even write it), hey - it's your thing and that's fine by me. I on the other hand accidentally read the beginning of one and an eye popped out of my face kind of like that scene in Friday the 13th 3D. I'm totally fascinated by the idea that people feel the need to write out and share certain scenarios but I have no desire to read them. Just - EWW!

That doesn't mean I don't understand the urge to write fan fiction. I don't write but I've read some (I've learned to look for sites that vet the material first). I understand the urge to change something or add something to a story because I understand the desire to make the story better (or at least less sucky - ask me someday for my very short version of Alien 3). For instance I've been reading all the Trojan War permutations I can find. I have disliked the fate of Troy ever since I read the Iliad, so the Aeneid at least makes up for their fate a little. I've been bothered by the death of Hector's son, Astyanax, so I was glad he gets to live in a movie variation, Troy. Hector still gets killed by Achilles though.

That leads me to David Gemmell's almost uniformly excellent Troy trilogy. It's biggest flaw is the hero, Helakion, A.K.A. Aeneas. He is nowhere near as interesting as Odysseus, Andromache, and an assortment of nifty made-up characters that populate the story. I was kind of put off by Andromache falling in love with this shmoe for unexplained reasons (other than he was hot). And, as if sensing his hero wasn't that great, Gemmell made Hektor an almost nonentity who people talk about but we rarely 'see' in action. But the narrative and the rest of the characters make up for the books. Hektor and Achilles' battle is pretty nifty with a twist I liked, and I could tell the legend of the trojan horse bothered Gemmell enough that he just had to change it. (SRSLY - any town stupid enough to let a hollow horse into their city walls after 10 years of battle pretty much deserves to be destroyed).

Then there's Dan Simmons' Ilium and Olympos which has to be read to be believed. I'll spoil just a little - Hector gets to live! Finally!! And Achilles' fate is well deserved and I'm still giggling about it.

So going back around to slash fanfic - are there any slash pieces about Hector and Achilles floating about? I would place money on it especially after Eric Bana and Brad Pitt got to play the characters in the movie but I'd rather cut out my remaining good eye with a dull spoon than go find out.

This is not where we were, either

Lake Guntersville State Park Campground, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

Hope everyone ate too much. We went to Oklahoma for Thanksgiving (photos soon come) where Brenden rode around with mom, dad and Ilu)on the 4-wheelers, and even got to wheel around in his own ride (I told you, photos soon come).

Ed and Jen were there too, and I seem to recall much beer and wine drinking the entire time we were there. Dad is doing fine and cooked a fantastic turkey. Ilu spoiled Brenden, of course. Dad took Brenden to the store once for a quick trip and Jon and I were nervous - for my dad. He survived. B seems to behave better for other people which is a good thing.

We also visited Jon's niece, Tiffany, whom Jon hasn't seen since she was a baby. She's 17, now. Those visits actually went well and included a trip to the Dallas zoo (photos soon. I promise!).

What I'm Watching: Jen had us watch Hamlet II which is quite funny and does nothing to refute my bigoted attitude towards drama students and teachers. I also had a very long laugh because a couple of weeks before I saw this movie I honestly spent some time wondering about what had ever happened to Elizabeth Shue.

We tried to watch Planet 54 in the theater but Brenden acted up and we left before it was over. I don't think I missed anything. It sucked.

I bought Star Trek on Blu Ray and it's a shiny movie. This time around I still enjoyed the heck out of it but I'm thinking that if the cast and their interaction hadn't been spot-on terrific the plot would have sunk it. Which actually, now that I think of it, is the problem with every decent to good Star Trek movie so never mind!

Random non-sequitur photo Friday

IMG_3139, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

I am currently reading David Gemmell's Troy trilogy; and it's something like the 4th re-telling of the Trojan war that I've watched / read (including Homer's take). It's not as much fun as Dan Simmons' totally loopy Iliad and Olympos, but it's as compelling. Of all people, Hektor's wife, Andromache, is my favorite character so far. I hope her fate is better than it was in Homer's version but I have a bad feeling.

Speaking of Dan Simmons, I ripped through his 3 trashy Joe Kurtz detective novels and I can't recommend them enough.

Massive Dynamic is the best name ever for a shady mega-corporation. I'm just saying.

Vacation Planning

digging2, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

Jon and I have decided to go to St. John again next year for vacation.
Well me, mostly. Jon just looked at my vacation research, which I love to do like a hobby but he hates to do with a passion, and pointed to the villa he liked the most from my shortlist.

The winner is Sea Cay, (pronounced 'sea key', sometimes I have problems remembering how to pronounce cay). It's right next door to a villa we stayed at in 2002 so I know the view is fantastic. I've also heard from people who have stayed there recently that it's in excellent shape.

Brenden will be a few hairs short of 5 on this trip. It's going to be a long six months or so, but it's nice to have something to look forward to!

Nothing much again

IMG_3167, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

Since Brenden has discovered Noggin Nick, Jr. I have had to watch much of that channel's programming. So this is pretty much a What I'm Watching post.

Blue's Clues: I don't know if this show is in production any more, but it's about a guy and his dog Blue. Blue leaves riddles around the house (heh) and the guy collects the riddles and tries to figure out what Blue is trying to say. Cute. Also bonus points for trying to teach kids about deductive reasoning.

Dora the Explorer: Dora and Boots explore and speak Spanish. I like this show. I hope no kid thinks he can keep a crime from being committed if he yells "SWIPER NO SWIPING!!!" long enough.

Go Diego Go!: I think he's Dora's cousin or something. He goes around rescuing animals. Cool for teaching kids about exotic wildlife, kinda boring otherwise.

Ni Hao, Kai-Lan: Kind of like Dora except Kai-Lan is Chinese. And she and her animal friends learn how to cope with emotions and social situations. Dora is more into solving problems. So I like Dora better. Brenden says "xie xie" a lot. I think that means "thank you".

Max and Ruby: Brenden LOVES this show. I hate it. It's about Ruby and her younger brother Max and they are boring bunnies. But Brenden loves it. It could use a retarded starfish or two.

The Wonder-Pets: My second most-hated show. A guinea pig, a turtle, and a duckling go out and rescue animals and sing about it. This program pushes cooperation. I keep hoping one of the carnivorous animals they rescue will treat them like a buffet.

Yo Gabba Gabba: This trippy show is hosted by a guy who desperately needs to eat a sammich or two. Other than that I like it; heck, Mark Mothersbaugh is a regular so how could it be bad? Fun songs sung by people in monster suits that Brenden likes to sing.

Wow Wow Wubsy: I miss Spongebob!

Laughing mom

Laughing mom, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

I'm still here, just nothing to write about.

One big note, Jon and I went back into debt to buy his business partner out. No offense to the partner; he and Jon didn't see eye to eye and it just goes to prove business partnerships suck bad. Don't ever do it.

Brenden went as a clone trooper for Halloween. He didn't have a meltdown this year when I closed the door when we ran out of candy.

Mal and Jayne, unlike Big Fat Kitty, are not afraid of people so they stayed at the screen door the whole night watching people come and go. Both of them like to sit up on their haunches for extended periods of time. Little kids would come to the door, the cats would pop up on their haunches to look at them, and the little kids would scream "I WANT KITTY!"

I had a flesh-eating zombie dream the other night. I got so bored I woke myself up. Seriously. I think my zombie affection is over.

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I lol'd perhaps too much.

Wild Thing

Don't Ask, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

Stacey took her 2 kids to see Where the Wild Things Are so we went too. I don't think the movie was too scary for Brenden, but the themes were over his head for the most part. I asked him afterwards if he thought the monsters were scary, and he said "No, they his friend!" He also understood that when the boy gets back in the boat, he's going home to his mom. Jon hated the movie and I liked it a bunch.

As the mother of a wild thing I felt empathy for the relationship between the troubled kid and his mom, and I loved that the kid behaved like an 8-year old - he wasn't brilliant or wise nor did he ever act like a little adult. He loved his monster friends but in the end he couldn't fix their problems. I think many people hated how down it was. I didn't think it was down - just truthful. Being a family is hard and sometimes all you can do is let them know you love them.

Speaking of hard: So yesterday I took Brenden to get his flu shot. He was having none of that. His new doctor, whom I like, had to hold him down and he screamed like his leg was being amputated. I think the 6 shots he got for his 4-year checkup pushed him over the edge.

Afterwards I bought him a bag of Skittles and some kool-ade (and me some beer for later) and we drove to see my doctor. I had to get my shots from the allergist. I wanted him to see that if you stay calm and don't look it doesn't hurt. He was fascinated watching the nurse shoot me, but he seemed skeptical about the whole staying calm business. He may be too young for me to appeal to his sense of logic.

One other fun child note: when Jon and I picked him up from his sitter on Tuesday, he suddenly turned around and tapped me on the belly and said "WHORE!"

Before I could belt him into Mississippi, he ran up to his dad (who had as big a "WTF" look on his face as I did) and tapped him on the belly and said "HIM!"

Yeah, he was trying to say "her" - getting the gender specifics of certain pronouns has been difficult for him. So I didn't belt him. We did work with him on his pronunciation.

Forgot to Mention

IMG_3294, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

I forgot one movie: we watched Monsters Vs. Aliens, and it was good. The movie ads were very careful not to mention that the main character is a woman, because we all know that girls have cooties and little boys will suffer from estrogen poisoning if they see or play with anything girl-related.

But: the main character, on her wedding day, is hit by a gigantic meteorite that is imbued with some glowy substance that turns her into a 40-foot giant. She's captured by the military and imprisoned with a bunch of other monsters including a man-cockroach mad scientist, a missing-link fish-ape, and an idiot blob of goo.

Aliens invade, looking for the glowy contents of the meteorite, and the military makes a deal with its monsters that if they stop the aliens, they will be freed.

Besides the thousands upon thousands of in-jokes that b-movie fans will enjoy, I enjoyed that the heroine grows from a shallow bride to a real human being, so to speak, and learns to appreciate her freakishness (and her monster friends).

Dreamworks has dropped the animation ball many times since Shrek II, but in this case: More like this, please.

*chirp* *chirp* *chirp*

Dad and son, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

Slooooooooooow news month.

Brenden invited Jayne to share the bathtub with him. Jayne didn't like it; not one bit. Brenden is lucky Jayne has been declawed.

fishing boy, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

I haven't written much lately because I haven't much to say.

I've been watching Fringe, Dollhouse, and C.S.I., the last of which had a tribute to Office Space with TPS reports and bosses named Lundberg in the last episode.

I forgot to mention Fringe acknowledged its pedigree the first ep back this season when a senator who was questioning the funding for the Fringe division bitched about similar non-results from the old 'X division'. Earlier on in the ep a soon to be dead guy was watching tv where Fox Mulder was getting abducted by aliens. Nifty!

Dollhouse's first ep back was only interesting in that Jamie Bamber guest-starred and he used his true English accent. I bet a lot of people didn't even know he's English.

I saw Race to Witch Mountain, based on that old Disney movie. It was ok. It's a child-safe Dwayne Johnson movie. I think he's fun to look at so YMMV.

Also saw Chocolate, a movie with a non-sequitur title. I finally figured out it was a Thai movie which means many people were kicked. It's about an autistic girl who instead of being able to recognize prime numbers or recite pi to the millionth digit watches too many martial arts movies and imitates what she sees. The plot is stupid, but the stunt people totally earned their money.

The Mushroom is not Relevant

Trail mushroom, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

Well, I have given up giving up caffeine. I'm kind of in a damned if I do damned if I don't conundrum.

First off, I have been drinking coffee since I was a kid and have been hardcore about it forever. I'm talking about a pot a day at least. I never deliberately tried to stop drinking it or to reduce my caffeine consumption in any way except when I was pregnant.

So there I was trying to keep my caffeine consumption to zero and I started experiencing aggravated athsma again. The last time I experienced bad athsma: when I was pregnant.

Check this out, or don't - here's the important excerpt:

Main results: Caffeine, even at a low dose, compared to placebo was found to significantly improve lung function, measured in terms of FEV1, FEF25-75 and specific airway conductance for up to 2 hrs post ingestion. This effect was sustained for FEF25-75 for over 4 hrs. Improvement was also seen in FEV1 up to this time, however this effect did not reach statistical significance. No data were available for specific airway conductance after 2hrs.

Or translated: I'm a caffeine maniac because it wards off athsma.

Bring on the java!

Brenden's First Fish!

Brenden's First Fish!, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

We just got back from a weekend of camping and fishing at Lake Guntersville. Brenden was very excited when he caught this fish. It was at least 3 pounds, and over a foot in length.

It was Saturday night, when we were all wore out from the day. He did not complain when we let his fish go.

Deep fried oreos!

Deep fried oreos!, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

No, I didn't eat one. Interesting concept, though.

By the way, what evil Safety Nazi made the movie theaters switch from coconut oil to vegetable oil to pop their popcorn? I bought some coconut oil and made some popcorn and the taste is 10 X improved! If I'm going to go to a movie in the theater and buy a $6 bag of popcorn, it better be tasty. Nowadays it tastes like styrofoam. If I owned some theaters, I would pop all popcorn in coconut oil and advertise the hell out of it.

We're going camping soon now that the monsoon season seems to be over. Brenden is totally psyched. We are borrowing a friend's boat so we can fish in Lake Guntersville. Brenden is doubly psyched about that. He told me we are going to "catch a fish, cut him up, cook him, and eat him. Yum!" (exact quote there).

The Evil Twins are home and losing their harbls and front claws hasn't slowed them down any. Yeah I feel a little bad about their claws (we didn't do that to Big Fat Kitty but he doesn't use his claws).

Fringe has returned, and I'm a little miffed that the first episode in the writers offed Olivia's partner, Charlie. In exchange the writers seem to be giving Agent Farnsworth more to do even though she's still Exposition Girl. Still I'm happy the mad scientist is back.

Dollhouse has returned as well and is in the ratings cellar (attic?) so here we go again.

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This pic reminds me of this story line from my favorite online comic, Sluggy Freelance.

Speaking of evil kittens, Mal and Jayne are in the animal hospital after having various bits removed. They are doing well.

Whee!

Whee!, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

I have nothing to say; I just wanted to post this photo of Brenden at the fair.

ARRRRRRRRRR(gh)!

stranger, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

The family went to the Cullman County Fair last night, and much fun was had especially by the little one. Photos soon come, but I interrupt the scheduled blather for a heaping dollop of RANT. It is not politically motivated, so don't hit your backbutton yet.

In the winter of 1990 - 91 I was stationed at Fort Riley, Kansas. Fortunately for me Manhattan - a college town - was nearby, so I was able to find a well-stocked book store without difficulty (these were the ancient days before Amazon). One day while browsing for titles I bought a book simply because I liked the cover: On Stranger Tides, by Tim Powers. The cover featured a skeletal pirate, complete with pegleg and parrot. How could such a book be bad?

It wasn't. It was damn good, and right up my alley. There were indeed pirates, as well as undead pirates, ghosts, voodoo, swordfights, Blackbeard - all kinds of fun. I know, it kind of sounds like a Pirates of the Carribean movie, doesn't it? I'm getting to that, but first I always thought the book would have made a terrific movie (there's a swordfight in the hull of a ship during a horrible storm and Powers's writing is so vivid I can still see that fight in my head). I had a faint hope that with the success of the POTC movies someone might be motivated to film this book. Be careful what you wish for.

The 4th POTC's full title, I discovered yesterday, is Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides. I thought I was going to have a brain aneurism right there, but it got worse. I Googled a bit and sure enough, found a press release saying this 4th installment would be "loosely based on the book". In other words, my beloved pirate book, a book I read at least once every couple of years, is going to make it to the big screen, with that idiot captain Jack SPARROW CROWBARRED INTO THE STORY.

The sad thing is I can see what character he can replace fairly easy. It's even sadder I can see where the screenwriter(s) could keep the main story faithful to the book even with the addition of Sparrow and Barbossa (Geoffry Rush's character) and the idiot crew of the Black Pearl. But what makes me saddest is that the screenwriters won't see what I see and John Chandagnac's journey from shallow euroweenie to Jack Shandy the brave and clever pirate will be shoved aside for Johnny Depp's Keith Richards impersonation. I bet money now that Jack Shandy won't even be in the movie at all.

I'm not happy about this development. Nope, not one bit.

Ruminating

Ruminating, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

Now that my bulging disc is no longer bulging and am no longer taking pain meds / muscle relaxants, I was able to kick caffeine again. I haven't had any in 8 days.

Speaking of coffee, since I discovered that my headaches are migraines I have been paying attention to triggers. I had strongly suspected that low pressure systems are a trigger as I get migraines when it rains. I have pretty much confirmed it, and that low pressure system that sat and spun around the Southeast for a week or so just about tore me up. All hail Trexamet!

Brenden had a fever this past weekend, and now he has an ear infection. Poor little guy!

Jon B and I watched Monsters, inc a few nights back and Brenden, for once in his life, watched the whole movie beginning to end. The power of Pixar compels you.

Brenden has stopped watching Spongebob and now watches Noggin. I'm glad in one way because Noggin doesn't air commercials, but I'm sad because he wants to play 'Max and Ruby' with me (a boring show about bunnies) and it's not as fun as being Mr. Krabs to Brenden's Spongebob.

Jon, Brenden and I watched Coraline, which should have done better at the box office. I spent the movie wondering if it was CGI or stop-motion or a combination (according to iMDB it is predominantly stop-motion. WOW!). Either way the animation was wonderful. I also love just about any story of a girl where the plot doesn't involve her finding the figurative or literal Prince Charming. Brenden stayed for bits and pieces but was riveted near the end when the cat became an important part of the story.

Speaking of Brenden and cats, have I mentioned that if Brenden would have ever manhandled (that's a sexist term, now that I think of it) my cat Vasquez like he treats Mal and Jayne I would have screeched and punished him severely. As it is I look at them when they play together and think "Meh, they deserve one another".

TNT aired Doom, The Chronicles of Riddick, and the Lord of the Rings Trilogy a few Saturdays ago - all these movies have Karl Urban in them. It wasn't billed as "Karl Urban Night" but still, thanks, TNT! You forgot The Bourne Supremacy, however.

The first two movies I mentioned are not good movies, viewable only because of some eye candy. I have hope that Mr. Urban will be offered better roles because he received attention for playing Dr. McCoy in Star Trek, but his latest role will be as an (ugh) vampire. Fortunately it will be an Evil Bad Guy vampire, and I can hope he will be more like Severen from Near Dark as opposed to Edward, Lestat, or the innumerable other neurotic poofter undead that infest popular entertainment.

9/11

View of the majestic World Trade Center, originally uploaded by chadisalem.

Today is the 8th anniversary of the day we learned we're vulnerable. Today Iraq is looking more stable, but in Afghanistan embedded reporter Micheal Yon says 'the West is losing this war'. I try to avoid the political, but nothing makes my skin crawl more than reading about women subjugated to radical Islamic laws. I snarked yesterday about the Hmong and the Montagnards and what happened to them when we gave up in Vietnam, but a few of them, at least, are safe here in the U.S. I worry about the women of Afghanistan - I doubt any will be able to offer them freedom and safety if we leave.

I like Micheal Yon's website because he writes about the soldiers overseas. He has written compelling stories about American and Allied soldiers and they always make me think about my brief experiences in the military. I know I have written about basic training and a little about active duty in my blog - I don't think I wrote much about the soldiers I knew.

Some people seem to totally idolize our soldiers as heroic icons of virtue and sacrifice, and some seem to view them as homicidal sociopaths. While you will find people (soldiers and civilians alike) who fall into these two extremes, the truth is of course soldiers are human beings, and you get all kinds. I met many men and women whom I liked, some whom I regarded as assholes, a few who frightened me, and a few whom I felt honored to have met. Sometime soon I should write about a few from the more interesting categories I have listed.

In the meantime, we haven't had another attack in the United States, and I'm grateful especially to the soldiers who have worked, many at great cost, on stopping those who would harm us, and I hope we do not give up on Afghanistan for the sake of the Afghani people, especially the women and the ones who have been helping us.

Now back to my irregularly scheduled drivel. Ooh look! Cat pictures!

CHEESE!

CHEESE!, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

What I'm watching:

Gran Torino: Clint Eastwood tells a bunch of pesky Hmong kids to get off his lawn. It's nice to see a movie that acknowledges what happened to the Hmong when we left Vietnam. Maybe someday we'll see something about the Montagnards.

I didn't watch this movie before because a reviewer I trusted hated it. She said it was about a racist who changes too fast and too conveniently. After watching it I'd have to disagree about Eastwood's character's racism. He is a misanthrope, and prejudiced, but I don't think the character ever came across as an out and out racist. He uses a lot of interesting words (for a Polack person of polish ancestry) but ultimately his character never judges anyone by anything but their actions. He might have been annoyed by his Hmong neighbors not taking care of their houses, but when he gets to know them a little, he understands then that they don't have the skills or the money. It's a better movie than I expected.

Hot Fuzz: I was talking with Ed this morning and I said that the idiots that make those horrible spoof movies, like Epic Movie and Not Another Teen Movie need to sit down and watch this terrific satire / hommage of bad action movies about a thousand times before they are allowed anywhere near cameras again.

It was made by the same group of folks that made Shaun of the Dead and it's about a London supercop (Simon Pegg) who gets promoted to Sargeant and is transferred to a country village because he's making the rest of the force, I mean service, look bad. It touches every single bad action movie trope you can think of: the by-the-book cop / slob cop mismatched buddy team, the budding bromance that borders on gay (there's a reason Point Break is referenced several times), over-the-top gun battles, gratuitous gore, four or five fakeout endings, and of course the completely rediculous plot. And best of all, this movie is a love-letter to action movies like Shaun of the Dead loves zombie movies.

I may need to buy me a copy of Hot Fuzz. Just talking about it makes me want to see it again.

9/9/9

More cuteness, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

Today is 'No Cats on the Internet' day, so I bring you a re-run of a picture of the demonic cats from the 9th circle of Hell our sweet kitties.

At the Beach (Finally!)

IMG_3138, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

I hope everyone had a great Labor Day holiday and didn't do anything too laborious.

We flew from Birmingham to Tampa on Southwest Friday morning. All hail direct flights! Dad and Ilu picked us up, we had lunch together, and then dad dropped us all off at Tradewinds Resort for the night. It wasn't full, which was great, and Brenden got an afternoon on the beach, which is what he's been begging for all summer ('Tomorrow we go to the beach, ok?' every single damn day). He had a blast chasing seagulls, collecting shells, and digging in the sand. He swam some, but he got saltwater in his eyes and he didn't like the stinging. We showered off and jumped into one of the resort's pools later on.

Saturday morning Ilu and I let Jon sleep in and we took Brenden to the beach for more swimming / digging. I had him sit right where the waves were washing up and I showed him all the little clams that got uncovered and dug their way back into the sand. He was endlessly fascinated by those little guys.

Dad picked us up around 2, and it turns out he had a nefarious motive for not going with us to the resort: he bought a new puppy! He has a cute little boy shih-tzu and they were still deciding on a name when we left.

Sunday Jon, B and I went to Adventure Island, a water park that's part of Busch Gardens. I must admit I have never been to a water park before. I didn't swim much after I was 12 because I was so nearsighted. But I had lasik in 2000 and that was the best money I ever spent. Soon after I took scuba lessons and I was delighted that I could see clearly to the end of the pool! Not to mention 3 feet in front of my face.

Anyways Brenden went nuts jumping into fountains, climbing, swimming, sliding, etc. We had fun in the lazy river, and we all took turns going down a series of very long and twisty slides. once I figured out that you needed to lay down to gain any speed, I thought the slides were terrific, too. Brenden was fearless, dropping down 30-foot tubes that opened up 8 feet up from a pool and dropping into 10 feet of water. He would swim to the ladder and repeat about 20 times. One of us always accompanied him to the top and one of us would wait at the bottom but he never needed help. Every time I would get a little overheated I would jump in, too. After a little hesitation he also jumped off a 10 foot 'cliff'. Some adults were turning away from those jumps after a lost gut-check.

About 3pm Brenden all of a sudden realized he was dead tired and started crying when we tried to get back into the lazy river. A little rest and some candy later we went back to dad's house and relaxed for the rest of the time we were there. Yes, that included some pool time. Brenden is probably growing gills.

While we were walking to our car once we got out of the Birmingham airport on Monday, Brenden asked me "Tomorrow we go to the beach, ok?" He was really upset when I told him we wouldn't be going back for a while.

More toys on the rug

More toys on the rug, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

Jon, Brenden and I are getting over colds. Colds suck, but better this week than next.

I had the niftiest dream last night! I was out on a beach somewhere collecting shells, clams, pottery shards, glass, etc. - All kinds of debris that had washed up on the beach. Then I forget the transition, but I ended up in a small kitchen somewhere that was jammed with all kinds of jars, bottles, books, etc. It was cluttered, but not unkempt. And Damian Lewis was cooking lunch for me! Then I woke up. Wish I remembered what we were talking about. Wish I could remember what he cooked for me.

What I'm Reading: I flew through Richard K. Morgan's science fiction series about Takeshi Kovaks, a somewhat messed-up ex-soldier. The first novel had a Raymond Chandler feel to it as Kovaks solves a murder mystery. The thing that I really liked about his character is he is in no way misogynistic unlike most gumshoes. It's a nice change. There's a lot of sex and violence in his books. That's not a warning, that's a recommendation.

I also read After Sunset, a recent Stephen King collection of short stories. I enjoyed them all. If there's a theme running through the book the stories don't just deal with horror and dying (common to just about everything King writes) but death and what happens afterwards. One of his short stories is about a man who played hooky from work on September 11, 2001 so he got to live. His survivor's guilt externalizes in the forms of items that his co-workers possessed, from glasses to desktop knick-knacks. That story made me cry.

I remember reading Carrie when I was maybe 14 or 15. That would mean only The Shining, The Stand, and Salem's Lot had also been published at that time. I think that makes Stephen King books one of my constants.

In totally unrelated news, HBO has given a greenlight to a pilot based on George R.R. Martin's Song of Ice and Fire series, books that piss me off sometimes but I still hold interest in. Now I wonder if we're going to have to get HBO again, because Lena Headey (Sarah Connor in the late SCC series) has been cast as Cersei Lannister. I was scared she would be cast as Catelyn Stark, whom I do not like. I hate Cersei, too, but it's more fun hating her because she's evil. Catelyn is just an unlikable character. Sean Bean is cast as Eddard Stark, and why does that not surprise me?

10 Years

Dada!, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

Happy Anniversary, honey (mwah!)! It's our 10-year anniversary today. We don't have anything special planned, except we're going to Tampa for an extended weekend soon.

I got to be Dora the Explorer a few weekends back. You would think being an explorer would be fun, but most of my work involved telling Swiper (Brenden wanted to be Swiper the fox) "Swiper, no swiping! Swiper no swiping!! SWIPER NO SWIPING!!!" Yawn. No where near as much fun as playing a greedy crab.("WHARS ME MONEY, SPONGEBOB?")

Brenden is back in speech classes, and Jon and I trying to work harder with him. His speech has improved, but he tends to get in a hurry and compress the words he's trying to use. Slowing him down and getting him to enunciate carefully is frustrating for all of us. But we do see (hear) improvement.

A few days ago Brenden got on his knees and straddled Big Fat Kitty and pretended he was riding a horse. He grabbed BFK by the ears and yelled "YEEE HA!" I was turning purple to keep from laughing my ass off, and I made Brenden get off the cat. BFK was royally pissed off (which made it even funnier) but he just doesn't fight back.

We are not amused

We are not amused, originally uploaded by Aviator_edb.

These two kitties are Mojo and Karma; Ed and Jen's new family members. I'm stealing Ed's photos again.

So the specialist looked at the MRI of my neck and explained to me what he was seeing. He was impressed with how roomy the holes in my vertabrae (technical term: foramen) are so there's plenty of room between my spine and the vertabrae discs. the bulging disk between my c6-c7 was apparent, but he said time is the best treatment and it should take care of itself. In the meantime he prescribed me muscle relaxants basically to help me sleep. It still aggravates me some when I try to sleep. Nontheless: hooray!

What I'm Watching: I finally saw Watchmen and I was impressed with how faithful it was to the comic book, right down to specific panels. Jon and I really enjoyed it, but we encouraged Brenden to go play on the computer because this isn't a kid's movie. Especially when we get to Rorshach's backstory. Yikes!

Besides the (for the most part) faithfulness to the source material, the casting was spot on. I only recognized 2 names - Billy Crudup, whom I remember from Almost Famous, played Dr. Manhattan (He of the Big Blue Wang), and Jackie Earl Haley, whom I remember from the original The Bad News Bears, played Rorshach. Rorshach was my favorite character from the comic book and Haley gave an award-worthy performance here. It will probably be a Saturn instead of an Oscar, but what can you do?

The Comedian, Ozymandias, Nite Owl II, and Silk Spectre II were all perfectly cast. I was really impressed with Nite Owl II - out of his costume he was a nerdy middle-aged wimp and when he gazed longinly at his costume, the costume looked silly. However when he finally put on the costume again he looked and acted badass and was a completely believable superhero.

I was a little disappointed at the change at the end, but not really at the change at how the destruction was caused, but who was blamed for it. Actually, that didn't bother me nearly as much as Dr. Manhattan not getting the last word in on the bad guy's little victory dance. One of my deeply held beliefs is the end never justifies the means because things don't end, so when I read the comic and Dr. Manhattan echoed that sentiment it really resonated for me. He should have gotten to say that.

Mal(evolent)

Zoe, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

This post is not really cat-related. But speaking of, our two new cats are devil's spawn but hell, they're cats so that's not unexpected.

I've been having problems sleeping, and while tossing and turning last night I got to thinking about BSG. I miss Starbuck and Madame Airlock mightily.

It might be time for a BSG rewatch, but I have been wanting to re-watch the X-Files as well as Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Not to mention I'm rewatching Lost.

Speaking of Buffy and BSG, Jane Espenson has a co-creator credit for the new sciFi Syfy show, Warehouse 13. It's a little uneven, but cute and I can definitely see the Jane influence in the humor (but without the bite. Usually with Jane Espenson if something is really really funny you cringe because something is about to happen that's the equivalent of being smacked with a two-by-four. Or kicked in the nuts, take your pick). Still, it's something to watch until my other shows start up again.

I mean, show. The only thing I watch religiously is Lost, and that's ending after next season. Well, there's Dollhouse, but I trust Fox about as far as I can throw a moose. Maybe it *is* time to revisit all those old shows. Remind me to buy Firefly and Veronica Mars on DVD before they go out of stock/print.

Jayne says (meow)

Jayne, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

What I'm reading:

I'm pretty exhausted from reading all but the first two novels (which I read earlier this year) in a row in Harry Turtledove's alternate history series- what if the South had won the civil war? There are 11 books in all - the first deals with a second Mexican war when the Confederate states buy enough of Mexico to extend their borders to the Pacific. The U.S. objects and the South kicks their ass again.

Then the next 3 books deal with World War 1 and the U.s. and the Confederacy find themselves on opposing sides due to who their allies are (Confederacy is aligned w/England and France and U.S. is aligned with Germany). During these books I was ambivalent as to whose side I was on. The U.S. invades Canada and treats Canadians like doo-doo, and the Mormons rebel in Utah and they are treated like ultra doo-doo. The South has problems too, like their black population deciding to rebel (England and France convinced the confederacy to give up slavery, but blacks are still treated like mega doo-doo).

I had hope for the Confederacy even though they lost because near the end of the war they decided to let blacks into the army and promised the ones who fought full citizenship rights. I thought that was a step in the right direction.

My hopes were dashed in the next 3 books, an interlude between world wars, when a bitter Confederate Veteran organizes a political Party that pretty much blames all black people for the South's problems. So this Southern dictator rises to power, browbeats the pacifist Socialist president of the U.S. (ya rly) into giving back some of the land they took in Kentucky and Texas, and then launches World War II (the subject of the last 4 books). He also launches the methodical extermination of all black people in the south.

I was definitely on the U.S.'s side during this war, but they weren't good guys. They didn't allow blacks to come into the U.S. nor when evidence of the massacres come to light did they even seem to care.

The books are very disturbing at this point and I wondered why I put myself through them. I guess because ultimately it was a fascinating read. And once I get started on some stupid series I have a tough time walking away from it. Yes, I'm waiting for the next book in the Wheel of Time series. Why do you ask?

But damn, I'm exhausted. I have started on some Dean Koontz books that Nancy gave me. If Stephen King is the literary equivalent of a Big Mac and Fries, then Koontz is the literary equivalent of a bag of Doritos. Not that there's anything wrong with Big Macs and Doritos (mmmmmmmmm).

What Boykins do Best Part Dos

What Boykins do Best, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

My brother Ed and I 'talk' via IM pretty much every weekday. When we aren't bitching to each other about the pointy headed people that make our jobs miserable, we're gossiping. We do not gossip about our neighbors or about movie stars, but we do gossip about movies and TV. Here's a typical exchange:

Sandy says: NBC is remaking the rockford files
Ed says: Someone is doing a Gunsmoke movie
Sandy says: Eesh.
Ed says: and John Hughes died
Sandy says:Yar, I saw that
Ed says: yah. Probably revenge from Jay & Silent Bob
Sandy says: If Jim Rockford is not a middle-aged shlub who lives in a trailer in this 're-imagining' I'm gonna be pissed.
Ed says: yup
Sandy says: Also, if they don't have the answering machine before the credits I'll be REALLY pissed
Ed says: lol, I forgot about that
Sandy says: Man, that was the best part! I wonder if they'll re-do the theme or use something completely different. You know, if John Hughes is dead, I wonder how far off remakes of The Breakfast Club and Home Alone are
Ed says: Ferris Bueller, 16 Candles
Sandy says: Yar, those too. And one of my favorites, Some Kind of Wonderful
Ed says: Weird Science, Planes Trains and Autos, jeez
Sandy says: Yar, Pretty in Pink. The guy defined the 80's
Ed says: Yeah

What does your dad do for a living?

IMG_2940, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

For your viewing pleasure, here is a link to Jon's jump from the blimp. I'm still pretty jealous; he got paid for it!

Kitty Update

IMG_2973, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

I took Zoe Mal and Jayne to the vet yesterday where they received some vaccination shots, a de-worming pill (the vet said it was cheaper just to give them the meds instead of checking so I said go ahead), and a general checkup. They are both healthy, rambunctious kitties. They also have ear mites, a gift from their outdoorsy mom.

Because kitty ear mites are highly contagious, the vet recommended I put the prescribed ear drops in Big Fat Kitty's ears as well. Mal and Jayne took the drops in stride, but Big Fat Kitty was having NONE OF IT.

I'm glad I only know a smattering of cat language because I was cursed out pretty soundly by an angry 22 pound kitty cat. Jon helped so I eventually got the drops in his ears.

I have to repeat the process every 7 days for 4 weeks. I'm looking forward to it.

Unintentional LOLcat

More cuteness, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

Ladies and gentlemen, I am embarrassed pleased to introduce you to Jayne (grey kitty) and Mal (black kitty). Yes, he's a guy. I thought he had some tackle, but I was going by what the woman who gave them to me said. Oh, well.

Baa Haabaa

bar harbor 045, originally uploaded by Aviator_edb.

My brother and his wife went on an RV vacation last week to Bar Harbor. So I'm stealing his vacation photos.

The pain is managable thanks to modern chemistry. I don't worry about addiction because when I was going through mastectomy recovery and getting my implant filled every week, the plastic surgeon prescribed me oodles of Darvocet and I popped those like M & M's. When I finally had my reconstructive surgery and recovered and the pills ran out, I essentially had been on pain meds for over 6 months.

When they did finally ran out, I was bummed for a week. Apparently pain meds suppress the manufacturing of endorphins (nature's feel-good chemicals) and it takes a while for natural production to get cranking again. I finally started feeling better and while I did miss the drugs some, the feeling didn't overwhelm me.

If I have to face surgery again, I am buoyed by knowing two coworkers who have had discs removed and their spines fused. Both of them are very happy with the results. We also marvelled at the fact that everything starts to break down once you reach the magical age of 40. What the heck happens when you reach 40? Does your body's warranty expire or something?

I need to find recipes that Brenden can safely cook. Non-heat recipes might be best. He has really taken to messing up my kitchen. I supply him with ingredients I don't really care about - rice, oatmeal, salt, sugar, parsely flakes, etc. and he goes to town. All I have to do is sit at the table and read a book and call him 'Spongebob' every once in a while.

Spongebob is a good role-model in some ways. He is a good example of how attitude affects everything. He loves what most people would consider a crappy job (short-order cook) because he's just a cheerful little sponge. And he is a hard-working, excellent cook and employee. I would love Brenden to emulate those qualities. I just hope he doesn't pick up Spongebob's habit of overreacting to everything (I may be a little too late there to stop that ).

ZOMGWTF

Red Brenden, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

Getting The MRI itself was uneventful. I'm glad I'm not claustrophobic is all I'll say. My doctor's office called this morning and the doc must have seen something in the MRI because I'm being referred to a specialist. A specialist of what, I neglected to ask. I also neglected to ask for a hint of what the doctor discovered.

The specialist's receptionist called after lunch, and I'm scheduled for an appointment August 18th and the specialist is A FREAKING SPINE SURGEON. I finally asked some questions but his receptionist was clueless. I called back to my doctor's and he and his nurse are gone for the day so I have to call back tomorrow morning.

You know, my seemingly constant medical problems had me believing I'm some kind of hypochondriac. But wtf am I supposed to think now?

In other nicer news, Brenden washed the dishes last night. He was pretending to be Spongebob working at the Krusty Krab (Brenden likes to cook and makes some good scrambled eggs, too). Every once in a while he would walk over to me (I was sitting at the table reading my Kindle) so that I would have to say "Get back to work, Spongebob! Yer losin me money, Spongebob! Think about the customers, Spongebob!" in my best Mr. Krab's voice. He thought it was great fun. Me, too, arrr.

Randomized Post

Brenden Zoe and Jayne, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

I definitely think my pinched nerve is getting better. I woke up Friday and noticed my arms didn't feel like they were falling off. Waking up is always when the pain is at its worst and I think it's because I try to sleep on my belly so my arms are under my pillow. But anyways they ached and were annoying but I wasn't whimpering like a kicked puppy. I have an MRI scheduled for tomorrow, anyway. I wonder if that vertabrae I broke when I was 15 is involved.

Even though I have given up skydiving and I don't really miss it, I am totally envious of my husband. One of the fun things about skydiving is finding different types of aircraft to jump out of. In my illustrious career I've jumped out of King Airs, Queen Airs, Twin Otters, Super Twin Otters, CASAs, Skyvans, Caravans, Cessna 172s, a Cessna 195 (with a radial engine! that was so kewl!) and fleets of Cessna 182s. I've jumped out of Bell and Sikorsky helicopters and on two memorable occasions hot air balloons.

But I, and the vast, VAST majority of skydivers have never jumped out of dirigables. Yes, my darling husband was down in L.A. (Lower Alabama) jumping out of a BLIMP! And to put salt on the wound he got paid for it! Most of the time you have to pay through the nose to jump out of something exotic like that. It's pretty nifty, he was a stunt double / camera man for a commercial for a Casino down there somewhere. Photos I hope (plus a link to the commercial, eventually) soon come.

Brenden is taking advantage of my disability - Sunday I took him to the local Dairy Queen to play in their enclosed play area. He and whatever kid available were having a terrific time, but after 2 1/2 hours my butt was getting sore so I told him we were leaving. To my embarrasment he fought like hell with me. Disgusted, I gathered everything and headed for the car. My intent was to put everything I could in the car so I could have 2 arms available. I was going to go back and throw him over my shoulder if I could (and whack his bottom good if I couldn't). But instead I turn around and a nice lady was leading him out of the store and he ran to me crying his head off! I was so embarrassed - he thought I was leaving him! Maybe I should have explained to him what I was going to do.

Instead of spanking him I gave him a hug and told him I would never leave him somewhere like that. Sheesh, I felt like such a shmuck. Still, it got him out of the play area...

Speaking of Brenden, I love that he will play with anyone, no matter the age, sex, race, whatever. I so hope he maintains that and doesn't let peer pressure convince him that girls have cooties or people with better suntans are inferior to his pink butt. So I love how much he loves Dora the Explorer. Never mind that she (and Diego, and Handy Manny, whom he likes as well) are hispanic, but one of his heroes is a girl! Well he of course is in awe of Sandy the Squirrel (he thinks I was named after her), but he really enjoys Dora. I hate the commercials I've seen for toys like Dora's make-up kit and Dora's kitchen. They don't need to make her more appealing to girls like that. The only thing I can see that doing is alienating the boy fans she has. Boo!

Guess What?

chickenbutt, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

Nerve is still pinched; I haven't done much the last week but pop pills and complain so I'll limit the complaining.

The doc has ordered the MRI; I don't know when it will be scheduled because the insurance company has to okay it first.

Doctor's Visit

IMG_3024, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

The doc ordered some x-rays, and said "Yep, you have a pinched nerve in your neck."

I actually don't know if he saw anything at all in the x-rays; that's just what he told me.

He also said most cases clear up on their own. He prescribed me more painkillers and muscle relaxants plus a week's worth of my old friend Prednisone. If it doesn't clear up or at least start getting better in a week, then he'll recommend a specialist.

I slept better last night, so maybe it's getting better.

Another good post to ignore

A matter of perspective, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

So I think I have won Old Person's Disease Bingo. I think I won Saturay, when I started experiencing a little aching in my forearms. As the day wore on the ache spread to my shoulders, and I managed to sleep for a few hours but I woke up with my back and arms on fire.

I called Jon and asked him to come get me to take me to the hospital when it became apparent to me that the pain was not going to go away. Stacey watched Brenden for us and we went to Decatur hospital. It's a shorter trip to Hartselle's little ER but Decatur is better equipped. I had a hard time staying still in the car seat and that was an excruciating 15 minute drive.

We didn't have to wait long but the entire time I couldn't sit or lay down; I had to continually walk around with my arms crossed over my chest.

I'm having a tough time remembering everything, but the doc eventually ordered some shots for me including a muscle relaxant, a steroid, and "morphine". "Morphine" is in quotes because I'm convinced that there was nothing but water in that syringe. I paced for 20 minutes while the muscle relaxant did it's job. While I was far more relaxed about it, none of the pain went away so I complained but the doc waited another 20 minutes before he gave me something real.

I think I woke up long enough to say "Yep, that did the trick" and I vaguely remember the drive home.

So what the hell is going on? I think it's a pinched nerve in my back. The doc gave me prescriptions for a painkiller and a muscle relaxant, and I don't need them until I go to sleep and then I need them again when I wake up because of pain. The symptoms: burning pain up and down both arms, I can't extend my left arm all the way without more pain, numbness and tingling both forearms and hands, and a loss of strength in my left hand.

Bummer. I go see the doctor tomorrow. If I need another operation I'm going to scream.

Some cuteness for the weekend

More cuteness, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

That is all.
Eom.

Ignore this post and look at the fuzzy kittties

Snug and smug, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

I'm tired today and desperately want coffee. I have not succumbed yet, however.

I'm sorry that XM and Sirius merged. I lost my favorite station, Fred, and 1st Wave is a poor substitute. The new stations all seem to have less variation. I try to listen to Lithium, for instance, the 90's station, but dammit, all they play is Smashing Pumpkins, Nirvana, and Pearl Jam. I know for a fact there were more than 3 popular bands from the 90's.

I'm listening to Octane as well. It's difficult for me to describe the music. Much of it is hard rock, I suppose, with some reminding me of what I would call progressive. Matter of fact I keep hearing music that reminds me strongly of old skool King Crimson, not that there's anything wrong with that. It keeps reminding me that I only have "Red" on CD. I need to get "Starless and Bible Black" and "In the Court of the Crimson King".

The band that reminds me strongest of King Crimson is Tool, only without all the frippery.

Sandy's Choice

IMG_3027, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

Jon and Brenden traveled to South Carolina for Jon's brother's twin's christening. I stayed home and freed myself from the evil clutches of caffeine. I had to do it; I'm pretty sure caffeine is one of my triggers for migraines.

I'm pretty sure alcohol is one of my triggers, too. I couldn't bring myself to give up both of them, not at the same time, so I made what I thought would be an impossible choice - give up the beer of give up the coffee. May nobody reading this have to make such a horrible choice. It's not Sophie's Choice, but it's darn close.

It has been over 100 hours and I'm doing fine. I'm surprised; I'm sure I've been addicted to caffeine for the last 40 years. Maybe my body is just living of a large residual effect and I'm going to crash in 2010 sometime.

Jon and B had fun; Jon reports compared to other kids Brenden is an angel. *Heh!*

Speaking of angels our two new kitties are devil's spawn - especially Jayne. Now if you remember I picked out Zoe and B picked out Jayne. But Brenden prefers Zoe so now she's his kittie and I'm stuck with the cat they call Jayne.