Best use for Bread

Food, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

The biggest problem with low carbohydrate diets is repetition. I am beginning to think this comes about because we are accustomed to varying our high carb foods. We get potatoes baked, mashed, hashed, french-fried, pan-fried, etc. Rice is more plain but there's still all kinds of flavors in your Rice-A-Roni aisle. Then there's flour - biscuits, rolls, pastries, croissants, cookies, and pastas! Pastas themselves come in all shapes and sizes and can be put into salads and doused with red, green, and white very yummy sauces (and I'm sure I'm missing some flavors/colors - don't forget mac and cheese, either).

The other side of the problem seems to me that the meat and veggies part of the meal equation seems to get overlooked. People tend to stick to chicken because of the higher price / fat content of pork and beef. Sometimes some fish and shellfish get thrown in the mix but we've been warned off of that too because of mercury. Veggies just get a bad rap because few people really like to eat them.

As far as I'm concerned, no meat is off-limits, except whale and human (I might modify those exceptions should I survive a plane crash in the Andes - I'm just saying!). Not that I'm going to go out of my way to look for monkey meat. The meat portion of the equation, for me, was that easy to solve. I no longer worry about price, I just plan ahead what we're going to eat more carefully and my grocery bill hasn't gone up. As far as chicken goes, we all prefer chicken thighs/legs to chicken breasts. Thighs are just tastier and are much harder to overcook.

Veggies are the hard part. I like vegetables. I've even learned to love broccoli. Getting Brenden and Jon to eat them is tough. Jon will eat salads, and vegetables cooked in stir-fry (in other words, coated w/ corn-starch gravy. I take my portion out of the wok before I add the corn starch and that solves that problem). Brenden will eat peas, sometimes green beans, and if I douse it with enough salad dressing, he has been seen eating romaine lettuce. so basically we eat a lot of salad. I have green onion, cucumbers, and snow peas mixed in to whatever bagged lettuce I buy. I stay away from iceberg. We all prefer romaine.

So usually I plan meals around either a single pot, like a stew or a stir-fry. Brenden will always pick the meat out of both. He loves Thai and Indian curry. I adore Thai curry because coconut milk is low carb (hooray!). If I fix Indian curry I usually take my chicken out of the pot before I add the curry mix (loads of flour). If I'm making a roast, burgers, steaks, or something like that, it's usually pretty easy for me to create a starch dish for them and an extra pot of some tasty veggie for me.

That reminds me - you know what rocks? Turnip greens with diced turnips. I use the frozen ones so I can season them myself. I usually fry up a diced strip of bacon, drain off most (but not all) of the grease, add a cup of water, 3 diced garlic cloves, and the greens and cook for 20 minutes. You know why it rocks? Decent fiber and protein counts, as well as lower carbs. I usually eat mine with tabasco instead of vinegar but that's me.

But I am always hunting different things that will work in low carbohydrate diets without resorting to frankenfoods. If it's going to take me 10 minutes to read the damn contents on the labels then its a frankenfood. In the last week I have found several:

1)Shirataki tofu noodles - these might be considered frankenfoods but really the ones I have found only three ingredients listed, all of which I can pronounce. These are low carb, low calorie, low fat. People are generally divided about their texture. When I first tried them, I found them a little chewy, but not bad. It took me a few bites to recall what it reminded me of: soft cartilage. Anyone who has had the misfortune of seeing me eat chicken wings knows I love cartilage (and marrow), so I like them. I had them with spaghetti and meat sauce (little sauce, much meat). They are quite filling.

2)Low carb tortillas - these are one of the few survivors from the low-carb fad because unlike most other low carb foods, these are tasty. You can't cook them in any way, though so don't bother to try to make them into chips. Then they taste like cardboard. But these fill that I-want-a-sandwich niche quite nicely. I made a ham-cheese-romaine-tapenade wrap Sunday that was very yummy.

3)Tapenade - it's chopped olive spread. I'm an olive freak so I had no problem trying it when I first heard of it.

4)Smart balance peanut butter - Very thick, with flax seed oil. I spread some on a low carb tortilla for a sandwich. I loved it.

I'm always going to be hunting for more and am open to suggestions. Except on the weekends I am really pressed for time and I have to cook around 3 people's tastes.

Good Calories, Bad Calories

Good Calories, Bad Calories by Gary Taubes, originally uploaded by livinlowcarbman.

This is in response to Nancy's comment, and a recommendation for anyone concerned about food: Good Calories, Bad Calories is a fascinating look at the cholesterol debate (a debate no one should even think about until they understand what cholesterol is), "western" diseases like diabetes, hypertension, and heart disease, and of course, how mercilessly the few people who think these problems are caused by refined carbohydrates are beaten down. It's wonderful inspiration for us who embrace the carniverous side of their natures.

But now it's recipe blogging time!

No-Roux Gumbo

"No roux? That mean's it's not gumbo!" Sure, fine, whatever:

2 Smoked turkey legs ($2 to Emeril - these are tasty!)

1/2 cup each diced onion, celery, green bell pepper (the holy trinity) or 1 small onion, 3 stalks celery, 1 bell pepper if you aren't anal.

3 diced garlic cloves

1 bay leaf

1 teaspoon ground thyme

1 1/2 cup chicken stock

1/4 cup dry white wine

2 tablespoons olive oil


Stick turkey legs & chicken stock in a crockpot. Cook on low for 4-6 hours, until the meat is easily removed. Take meat off & set aside. Place everything not meat from the legs back in crock pot & cook on high for 2 hours. Yes, you can add some more veggies to the crock pot for even more flavor in the stock. I didn't bother. In the meantime dice or pull the meat & chop the veggies.

Once 2 hours are done, strain out the remains & reserve the stock. There should be little fat so don't worry about removing it. The first time I made this I put the stock in the fridge to solidify the fat for removal but there was so little (just tiny beads) that next time I won't bother.

Put olive oil in big pot (dutch oven works nicely), heat medium high, and saute trinity veggies until translucent. Then add garlic. Not before. Stir some, add white wine. Stir some more while alcohol burns off.

Add chicken stock, bay leaf, and thyme. Once it is boiling add turkey back. If it seems like you could use more liquid, add some water or chicken stock. Part of the reason for cooking the bones for so long was to get all the collagen which should have thickened the stock a little. I like the consistency of the gumbo a little thicker than stew hence so little liquid. The flavors are so concentrated that I didn't miss the gravy. Matter of fact there's so much collagen that the leftovers I had in the fridge popped out of the tupperware like one big mound of jello.

Anyway, cook that on low for maybe 10 minutes or so, adding salt and pepper to taste.

As you may have noticed, this recipe is somewhat low-fat as well as low carb. You can always do what I did - during the veggie saute I threw in half a pound of andouille sausage (YUM!). Ham, bacon, or Kielbasa are also welcome.

If you have family members who are gritching about lack of gravy, have a bottle of filé powder ready for them. They can sprinkle it in their own stew until it's thick enough. That's how gumbo was served originally, anyway. You can also make a batch of rice for those more inclined to eat carbohydrates.

Not Even Closely Related

dontleavethepath, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

Back on the Hamster Wheel:

I find it totally amusing that I have been doing the diet yo-yo for about 10 years now. I lost weight accidentally when I started skydiving (down to 117 pounds); bloomed back to 135 (about my normal weight forever), then the wheel began. Am I mixing my metaphors? Sorry.

Here's the thing: I gained an enormous amount of weight during my pregnancy. Once Brenden was delivered and everything settled down, I weighed in at over 170 pounds. It took about a year and a half but I was able to get as low as 129. It wasn't slow and gradual; I would bite the bullet, eat low calorie, lose about 15 pounds, take a break, gain 5 back, and the process repeated itself.

I could not get below 129. It wasn't because I hit a plateau, I simply got sick of starving. I hit 129 at the beginning of this year and once again I slowly expanded to 149. I tried what I tried before but I was hit by something I didn't have that many problems with before and I was hit by constant ravenous hunger.

It's not a mystery; I had a secret weapon in my arsenal before and it was ephedrine (not ephedra, ephedrine. There is a difference). I can't take a drug like that indefinitely so part of why I bloomed back is because I was no longer taking it. Every time I made the determination not to diet with it I couldn't handle the hunger (ephedrine dulls appetite).

I decided I wouldn't be able to lose weight until I got the appetite back under control, but ephedrine this time around was giving me headaches so I stopped. I had to find a non-pharmaceutical way of controlling my appetite.

I told you that to tell you this: I read this blog entry and it convinced me to go give a low-carbohydrate diet another chance.

Yes, I've heard plenty of stories of people getting sick on low carbohydrate diets. But I don't intend to let myself get sick. If I start feeling bad, I will modify what I'm doing.

As of today after 3 weeks I'm down to 138. After 1 week of feeling pretty awful (most lowcarb advocates claim it's normal to feel crappy as your body gets used to the switch) I have felt 2 side effects that have convinced me to keep going:

1) I'm not hungry. Matter of fact I'm so not hungry that I am keeping a journal of the food I eat to make sure I get at least 1200 calories a day. I started it because I felt faint the first time I worked out. Making sure I get enough has stopped that.

2) I can think clear. That sounds strange, doesn't it? I have had so many memory and thinking problems since my pregnancy ended it scared me. It affected my work - no it affected everything because I have had a horrible time concentrating. But I literally woke up and went to work exactly one week after starting this diet and I recall sitting there, stunned, at how calm I felt. My short-term memory has improved, my mood has improved, and I am no longer constantly tired. Sometimes I don't get enough sleep because Brenden doesn't like to sleep through the night, but I am able to cope much better. In other words, I might be dog-tired from only 5 hours of sleep but I can still function. Before I would have had to write off the entire day.

Before anyone emails me their horror stories of people getting sick on low-carb diets, do you have any idea how grateful I am that I have my mind back?

I'm not following anybody's plan. I'm eating adequate protein (at least 60 grams/day), all the damn veggies I want, taking fish oil and a general vitamin supplement as insurance, and if I'm not hitting my calorie count I eat CHEESE BABY, CHEESE!

This Photo is Way Unrelated to This Post

_MG_8734, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

Tuesday afternoon after work I had a letter from the Mammogram Center telling me that my test was 'abnormal' and I needed to get in contact with my doctor for a follow-up. Of course I got to the mail box 10 minutes after the doctor's office closed so I had a sleepless night.

Yeah, I know. I had an ultrasound right after the mammogram and it was supposedly negative.

But anyway I called the doc in the morning, and his nurse said he'd call me as soon as they pulled the chart. He called me back in 5 minutes which was nice, and amazing. He actually apologized for not calling me before I received the letter. I heart my ob/gyn.

So anyway he explained that the x-ray showed some 'calcification' in my upper right breast, which is usually nothing, but since this was my first mammogram, he couldn't be sure it is nothing. The gist of everything is I will see a general surgeon on Tuesday for a consultation to schedule a biopsy. I don't know it's going to be a big old needle or cutting me open to grope around.

I felt bad Tuesday night and some of Wednesday, but now I feel okay. From everything I have read it's probably nothing.

Tantrum Boy

Tantrum Boy, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

Here's something you might need to know should you be or ever plan to be a parent: Never *ever* give your already-hyper toddler a Diet Coke. That's all I have to say about that.

Random memory from College:

I remembered this today and I don't know why: One day the two women who lived next door to me and my roommate came to talk to us. They looked fairly indignant and in retrospect, I don't blame them. Apparently one weekend I had crashed at a friend's house and had neglected to turn off my alarm in the dorm room so it woke them up on an early Sunday morning. As one of the roomies said "we had to go get an RA to open your room to get it turned off!"

Of course I apologized and promised it wouldn't happen again - it was thoughtless and embarrasing but it wasn't enough for them. One weekend when I did sleep in my dorm room they did the same thing to me. I was woken up by their alarm (they must have pushed it next to the separating wall), and after a while when it wasn't shut off I knew what was going on.

I'm not as stupid as they were, however. I knew where the circuit breakers were. I flipped breakers until I heard the alarm go off then went back to sleep. That was the end of it, by the way.

Choo-Choo Belly

Belly, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

I totally forgot to mention that the weekend before last Brenden and I came up to Huntsville to see a cat show. My sister had a cat in competition; a beautiful oriental longhair. Brenden was thrilled to see so many kitties, and he talked with a lot of them("Meow!" "Meow!!" "Meow." "Meow!") and got cross when he wasn't allowed to touch them. Andrea let him pet her kitty.

He got really grumpy so we left after a couple of hours and it turned out he had a case of CTF (classic toddler fever). He was better the next day. Andrea's cat placed pretty well, but I don't understand the intricacies of cat shows to explain.

This week Brenden impressed me on several accounts: he actually used a three word sentence which did not contain the word "dada". He said "More please milk!" so of course I got him some more milk. He's also gaga for strawberries. I can't really get him to eat vegetables but he will eat fruit. He's also way into Kielbasa and roast pork. He will actually ignore mac & cheese if the protein on his plate is good enough.

He of course did several things not so impressive: one we were playing on the bed and I smelled a distinctive odor - I asked him "do you have poop?" and he deliberately lied to me and said "no". I checked and he had a stinky. I left him on the bed to get the neccessary supplies, and he took his diaper off and sat down on the bed. I guess he was trying to be helpful.

He also, after his bath last night, ran around the house nekkid for a while (air-drying - giving his butt a break from all them diapers). Sometimes he leaks and that's ok, the floor is laminate. But he chose to piddle on my foot last night. No, I didn't rub his nose in it in either case. I did make him wipe up the pee, however.

Other than that, nothing new. I did see a couple of movies:

I saw Galaxy Quest again, which I love. I did see something new so I present a full-fledged Movie Review:

Ghost Rider: Bleh. Sloppy writing, Nicholas Cage. That is all.

On the run

On the run, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

I had my first mammogram ever yesterday. I had a tiny moment of "YEEK!" when the nurse took me for an ultrasound after the mammogram. Turns out there was nothing there. The amusing part of the process was sitting in the waiting room after the xrays - all of the women were older than me and they were all bragging about their ailments, aches, and pains. Seriously! The oldest and most infirm there proudly proclaimed that she got off Noah's ark on a pair of crutches.

Brenden's new favorite word: "Mine!" Sometimes he sounds like those silly birds in Finding Nemo.

Morning Cheese

Morning Cheese, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

Jon and I witnessed a car accident on the way to work yesterday - what I saw was an out-of-control SUV veer across two lanes of traffic, strike a ditch on the side of the highway, then overturn (later on Jon pointed out that it looked like one of the tires blew).

We pulled over and Jon threw his phone at me while he got out to help. I dialed 911 and babbled as he kicked out one of the windows and helped the two shaken-up young women get out of the car. I got out of our car to walk over to the two women while talking to the dispatcher. Jon later told me he had a bad moment when he saw an empty baby seat in the back of the vehicle, but the women assured him that there had been no kid in the car.

I was too excited and felt stupid. The calltaker guy needed some coherent information from me so I tried to calm down and answered his questions without rambling (I hope). I also felt like since I have had medical training (20 years ago) I should at least get close to keep an eye on the victims.

Other than nausea and cuts and scrapes (and that just-been-in-an-accident 2000 yard stare) they were ok and responsive.

Finally a police car, ambulance, and some fire trucks came so we left so that the victims could be taken care of. I noticed some things: many people pulled over to help and I wasn't the only one on a cellphone talking to a calltaker (at least I hope they were talking to emergency authorities and not their buds describing what they had seen). There are some advantages to the cell phone revolution, and I'm glad I live in a place where people will stop to help someone in trouble. Oh, and our van didn't get stolen, which is what happened to a good samaritan who stopped and helped someone in trouble in Atlanta recently. I'm still glad I moved from there.

On to Brenden news: he dragged this quilt that his abuela gave him out of his room and was playing "night-night" with it. Instead of returning it to his room afterwards I spread it out and he dumped all his Thomas the Tank Engine trains on it and plays on it like a rug, running the trains along the tracks stitched in. He has a one-track (har!) mind here lately.

We spent some time out at the drop zone on Sunday after feeding the ducks and we ended up playing "tackle mommy" on the carpets. He'd get a good running start and hurl himself in my arms, bowling me backwards. Dad got down from a jump and joined in the fun. I'd love Brenden to play baseball when he gets older but he has all the makings of a linebacker (except the genetics - you're doomed to be short, bud, despite your current size).

I paid for letting him sleep with me - he got up monday night and cried most pitifully at the gate while clutching his pillow to him. Jon eyed this suspiciously and asked me if I had let him sleep in our bed. Thanks for ratting me out, kid! The wierd thing is I never take his pillow off his bed - he uses his dad's (or steals mine).

I got him to say "wuv you" this morning! When I let him play his alphabet game on the computer he now likes to shout after the game. He'll hit a letter on the keyboard and the computer will say a word that begins with that letter and he'll shout the word back. It's totally cute ("YACHT! BAWL! DO! AYPLA!").

Ooo dada wook!

Ooo dada wook!, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

Letter to Brenden month 28:

With your dad away so much in the last month, I let you sleep with me a few nights. You are a total blanket hog, hon. What's worse is back when dad was in Switzerland you woke me up one night. You were kind of growling and complaining, and when I finally turned to look at you, you were sitting up tugging at _my_ pillow.

I picked you up, hugged you, and said, "no hon, this is your pillow". I gently set you down and pulled the blanket over you and kissed your forehead.

You sat straigh up, and distinctly said "bleh!" as you picked your pillow up and flung it off the bed. You then grabbed mine, pulled it on your side of the bed (which is apparently 90% of the square footage of said bed, leaving 7% for Big Fat Kitty and the rest for me), and flung yourself down on the pillow.

I was too stunned to react, and by the time I did, a few seconds later, you were snoring. I *should* have picked your ass up and put it in your own bed. I admit it - I picked up your pillow instead and went back to sleep.

Aayyyyy!, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

What I'm Watching

I finally managed to watch the 2 new shows I was threatening to watch (in wide-screen hi-def TV, and thank you so much honey for the nifty-kewl birthday birthday present).

Both of the pilot shows were so-so, but I'll keep watching because most of the time pilot shows are too busy for their own good establishing characters, themes, and plots. It's a shame network TV can't let these elements accumulate over the course of 5-6 episodes but I understand there's a great deal of pressure to SUCCEED NOW! Of all the shows I am watching, only Lost had a pilot that knocked my socks off. And now that I'm thinking of it, the first episode of 24 was fairly good but not great. Battlestar Galactica had the luxury of a 4-hour mini-series for a pilot, and it was mediocre compared to the rest of the show. Deadwood,Veronica Mars, the X-Files, even Buffy the Vampire Slayer picked up steam as they went along.

So what am I saying? Both pilots were too busy for their own good. the Bionic Woman has an interesting premise and Katee Sackhoff so I will give it a chance to develop. It also has Miguel Ferrer as a kind-of buttheaded Oscar Goldman type. What happened in the pilot? Not much, in the sense that if you watch it tonight, I'm sure it will take a minute or two for you to catch up with what is going on.

Life is fairly standard cop fare, but it looks like one of those shows, like Veronica Mars, whose whole might be more than the sum of its parts. I mean that it will have a fairly significant story arc concerning the murders that Detective Crews was convicted of.

Things I liked: Damian Lewis (duh) and his down-on-her-luck parter Detective Reese (Sara Shahi, a very pretty woman of Iranian/Spanish descent). There's some good chemistry there. Things I disliked - they need to shitcan the whole Zen thing. Crews spent most of 12 years in solitary confinement so that he wouldn't be continuously brutalized by the other inmates and is therefore slightly off. He studied Zen and spouts it often. It's only funny when he's annoying the piss out of the people around him. It was nice to see his character go into full-bore hate mode when he and his partner are visiting a prisoner in jail and the guards taunt him. People who only know Lewis from Band of Brothers probably don't realize how well he does a hateful glare (those of us that sat through The Forsyte Saga know too well how deadly those glares can be). I'll watch, because the arc might get interesting. I mean, why would a guy who spent 12 years in prison rejoin the police force, especially after he was awarded a healthy settlement? Why to go after the people who allegedly framed him, of course.

Oh, who am I kidding? I'd watch infomercials if Damian Lewis hosted them (I'm that pathetic but I hope to Wodan that Mr. Lewis isn't).

Malaprops R Us:

People really really REALLY need to pay attention to their spell checkers! I'm on record for screaming every time someone uses 'reign' when they mean 'rein', but these really burn my ass (as does a 3 foot flame):

Well, trying to time your purchase at the exact “perfect” moment is truly a fuedal effort.

I suppose if your clocks are from the Dark Ages.

When the show began I was a little weary about this character, but not so much anymore.

I'm a little leery of tired people, myself.

(They are) sifting through Jigsaw's latest grizzly remains and piecing together the puzzle.

Apparently, in Saw IV, the bad guy likes to kill bears. That's a refreshing switch!

I'll post more as I find them because malaprops are rampart on the web!

IMG_3631, originally uploaded by Sandra Maynard.

Actually, we did not go to Sportsmans Lake this weekend and feed the quackers and honkers but a nice person sent me these photos that she had taken at the beginning of September (Labor Day, to be exact).

Jon made it home jet-lagged but in one piece. We drove him to the airport on Sunday, however, because he has to teach a class in St. Louis. He'll be home on Friday. Brenden and I consoled each other by eating all of dad's swiss chocolate.

The ratio of hours of enjoyment to dollars spent, when it comes to Play-Doh, is pleasingly high in our household. I, however, am about as talented as a kindergardener and was only able to make little balls and strings. Brenden didn't mind; he'd take my little arsenal of Play-Doh balls and pound them flat with his plastic Bob the Builder hammer or load them up in one of Duck's flatbed trailers and choo-choo them around the table (Duck is a friend of Thomas).

Brenden's vocabulary is exploding - he surprised me during one of our Play-Doh sessions, by saying "poop!" and making the ASL sign for poop (make a thumb's up signal and grasp thumb w/other fist. Pull thumb out of fist. It's a very descriptive sign). He didn't get it quite right, so I showed him how and he got it right. Then it occured to me to actually check for poop. He had a good diaper load.

I was telling Jon on Saturday that my favorite part of being a parent was showing Brenden how to do something and watching him get it. The above forementioned poop sign is one example. He has a tough time with the "L" sound so I was showing him how to stick his tongue between his teeth and make a voiced noise and he got that too (he still can't combine it with words yet so light is still "wagh"). He can operate the DVD player quite well though I do have to discourage him from touching the disks after he eats warm, gooey chocolate chip cookies. After I chase him down and attack him with a warm washcloth it's okay though.